Patience

It’s been over a year since I started my current job.  Like any other job, there are ups and downs; good days and bad days; days when I’m ready to quit and pay my rent training the canines of the wealthy Westchesterites (Weschesterans? Westchesterers?) and days when I come home glowing from a major accomplishment.  I know, I know – most of you can’t fathom how somebody who works with 30 Golden Retrievers on a daily basis could possibly have a bad day.  Trust me, it’s not the dogs that cause the bad days (exceptions: diarrhea, vomiting, and behavioral issues do account for about 5% of all bad days).  Lately, though, I’ve been having a tough time finding pleasure in my day-to-day job.  The bad days have outweighed the good for whatever reason – usually because of office politics, bruised egos (my own or others’), and general frustrations.  I’ve been struggling and I realized today that I had lost sight of the bigger picture.  I realized that despite all of my frustrations, despite all of the drama and egos and stress and disenchantment that I have grown enormously as a person because of this job.  

Today I watched as the latest group of trainer trainees worked with the latest group of disabled clients.  I saw myself a year ago in their shoes.  I watched them trip over themselves to help these people, to grab the leash, command the dog, not realizing that these are the behaviors that foster dependence, not the independence that the clients crave so much.  We are providing service dogs, not service humans, so unless they want to go home and live with these clients, they better step back.  I watched them become frustrated as the clients “ruined” “their” dogs.  The dogs challenged these clients who can’t move their arms, legs, or speak clearly.  The dogs pulled, they refused the retrieve, they ignored the clients and I watched the trainers jump to the rescue to get the dog’s attention, give treats, give commands, prove that “their” dogs new the commands.  I used to do that.  I used to jump to the rescue but today I stood back and watched trusting that the process would work itself out, as I’ve seen happen repeatedly over the past year.

In the past year, I may have become a better dog trainer, though that’s not obvious.  I may have become a better teacher, a better volunteer manager, or a better office organizer (also not obvious).  The most obvious thing I’ve learned in the past year is patience.  It took 25 years, but, Mom, look!  I am actually patient.  I realized this as I watched one trainer after another give up in frustration working with a particular client with physical and vocal limitations.  This client cannot pet the dog, she cannot produce treats or toys, she cannot move her own wheelchair.  However, this client is mentally incredibly nimble and bright.  She knows all the commands, but it can take up to 3 minutes for her to produce them orally.  It is so tempting to just spit it out, just tell the dog what to do, try to put the words into her mouth in the hopes that saying them before her will make her say them faster.  Instead, I wait.  The door may close 3 times before we get the sequence of commands to get through it, but I’ve got time.  And here’s the kicker – I absolutely adore working with her and admire her as the woman that she is.  And tonight, as I was leaving for the evening, she said to me with a huge smile on her face “You are so good at your job, you’ve taught me so much, you actually listen to me, and I am lucky that you’re working with me.”  Ladies and gentleman, that is what I’ve learned this year and that is why, no matter what, I love my job career.  

Teaching

I never really thought about becoming a teacher.  I’m not nurturing, nor do I particularly like kids, nor do I particularly enjoy speaking in front of people, nor do I have any patience.  Like, none.  At all.  Over the past few weeks, as I’ve transitioned into taking over my own class, I’ve surprised myself by how much I am actually enjoying the challenge of motivating and educating my kids and their dogs.  On Tuesday, my students were playing their “my dog does everything already so I’m done” game.  I don’t blame them – it’s exhausting to train dogs for 2+ hours.  Lunchtime roles around and I have 8 boys and 10 sandwiches.  Everybody got 1, but they’re growing teenage boys, so they’re starving.  Whoever’s dog tugs open the heavy door and sits and holds it open long enough for you to walk through it, wins a sandwich.  You get 2 tries and then the next person goes.  We go through all 8 dogs and some came close, but inevitably dropped the door before the student could get through it.  They’re getting really competitive, coming up with new techniques, different ropes on the door, different positioning of themselves and their dogs.  They’re really thinking about it and getting so frustrated that their dog can’t do it.  Finally, on the second time through the group, Dior and his student won their sandwich.  They were proud of themselves, though everybody else was jealous, worked up, unhappy with their ¼ of a sandwich.  It was nice to see the kids enthusiastic, motivated, creative, and trying incredibly hard.  Nicer, though, was seeing the kids the following 2 days as they worked and problem solved how to get their dog to really know the commands involved. 

In order to calm some of that heated, competitive energy, we worked on teaching the dogs not to get too excited when people get on the floor with them.  Having them lay underneath their trainer is great practice for clients with narcolepsy who may need the dog to pick their head off the ground if they're face down and in danger of suffocation.  Though it resembles nap time, it really is work!

Handsome Boy

This is my serious face...

...and this is my smile

Training Truman

For the past 3 weeks, I've been dog sitting for a 2-year old pit bull named Truman.  Truman's mommy travels a few weeks each month, so Truman and I will be getting to know each other very well.  Knowing this, I am trying to build a relationship with him that we both enjoy.  In other words, I don't want this dog to own me or run my life, something he's apt to do.  Despite being a Nervous Nelly, afraid of his own shadow, Truman seems to think he's leadership material.  Sorry dog, I am alpha.

Pills, Ointments, and Wipes
Truman has severe allergies.  He takes 3-5 pills a day, needs his ears and feet wiped down, and needs ointment put in his ears.  His mom left me a muzzle and said "you'll need this.  He bites when you try to do anything to him".  I truly believe that he has tried to bite her because he knows he can.  However, Mr. Truman knows better than to bite me.  I shove his pills down his throat and stick my fingers and his ointment in his ears twice a day.  He's not thrilled, but who would be with a crazy lady shoving 3 pills down your throat.  I pat myself on the back for this one.

Walking
There is nothing enjoyable about walking with Truman.  First you put on the prong collar.  Next you hook up the leash.  Next you stuff your pockets with treats.  Next you get dragged down the block.  I DO NOT get dragged by dogs.  So, I dig in my heels and get him back into position.  "Truman, heel, yes" treat.  Take a step.  "No, Truman, heel, yes" treat.  Perhaps he stays in position long enough that I manage to take 5 steps.  Then I've lost him.  Or, much worse, he's turned into a psycho dog and decided to latch onto his nylon leash, locking his jaw, and sometimes taking a nibble out of your arm.  Now you've got a crazed, super strong animal dangling from a leash.  Excuse my language, but "shit!".  Now what?  I dove deep down into my affective domain (training term for gut) and let him have my biggest "NO! drop it!" along with a hard knee to the stomach.  This managed to get us home, where I promptly emailed his mother, fingers shaking on the keys, and said "you didn't tell me about his nylon leash obsession!".  Oops.  Ok, a challenge.  Truman wore his nylon leash for a full week.  In the house, in the yard, etc.  Sometimes I was on the other end (which caused him to become super attached to me).  Other times it was dragging behind him.  Either way, I figured, let's flood him with this damn leash.  Shove it down his throat along with all his pills.  We tried a walk again.  This time I was smart.  2 leashes: one nylon, one chain.  He tries to latch on to the nylon and I just drop it and pick up the chain leash.  At least I won't lose the dog!  Walk in circles in the driveway.  "Truman, heel".  He grabs the nylon leash, I drop it.  He doesn't think this is fun and loses interest immediately.  Treat.  We have been doing this for 3 days.  He's still trying to latch onto the nylon, but if I drop it right away he thinks I don't know how to "play" and loses interest.  Score.   All the while attempting to teach "heel" and "watch me" and "leave it". 

Growling in bed
This one is simple to describe and damn near impossible to fix (for me).  I get into bed.  Truman has 2 toys in bed.  He plays alone for 30-45 minutes.  I drift off to sleep.  30 seconds later, Truman is standing over my head growling at me.  Repeat.
Things I've tried: removing the toys, ignoring the growling, petting him, letting him out, growling back, biting him, correcting him, kicking him off the bed, locking him out of the room.
Suggestions wanted.  I'm tired. 


Ok, folks, I know this was a long post, but I figured all my fellow dog-folks would enjoy taking on some of these challenges.  I'm willing to try any suggestions you want to throw out there.  Note, Truman is not food driven.  Not even a little.  The dog turns down bacon!  His pain tolerance, like most pits, is astronomical.  A correction that would send a golden/lab flying doesn't even make him blink.  In fact, I'm pretty sure he feeds off it.  All this being said, he's truly a sweetheart and a very handsome boy and I am quite fond of him.  I would just like to be able to live with him!

Ready, set, brainstorm!

Ahhh, life

Dear Life,
I lost you there for a few months. Seems you got buried and pushed down by all that work. Thanks to dog-sitting for Mr. Truman, I have had 2 blissful days getting reacquainted with you. Work is so much more fun when you don't live there and life is so much more fun when you don't work there!
Love, Lia

My New House

I had a hell of a week (see I just need a moment...).  On Saturday, I started casually seeking a new home.  By casually, I mean I looked at 4 properties, fell in love with the first one I saw, completed the application (no easy feat), went back today to see it again (bringing Pauly to convince them that "no pets" does not mean "no Paulys", and signed a lease.  Beginning March 1, I am officially the proud renter of a house.  My new house is about 15-minutes from work, it has 3 bedrooms, a remodeled kitchen, a living room with a wood fireplace, a 1-car garage, a full basement with washer/dryer, and a fenced yard.  AND, the rent is comparable to 2-bedroom apartments.  AND, my landlord pays for heat and hot water.  Can you feel the excitement in my typing?  I'M SO EXCITED!!!

The front of my new house

The side of my new house.  Detached garage to the right

Kitchen with all the work stuff in it

Hallway out of kitchen.  Living room on left, bathroom on right, two bedrooms ahead, one bedroom to left

Living room, fireplace, built-in

Moving clockwise in living room

Front door into entry into living room

Living room

Bedroom 1

Bedroom 1

Bedroom 1 closet

Bedroom 2 (my office)

Closet in office

Office leads to bedroom 3

Bedroom 3 (taking suggestions on uses of this room, my least favorite)

Large closet in bedroom 3

Lots of room in bedroom 3

Ugly floor in bedroom 3 = reason I dislike this room

Patio & Yard (play set will be removed)

Yard

Yard

Yard with entry to walk-out basement

Sunday Dahl

One of my favorite things to make on Sunday nights is a big pot of Dahl.  Dahl is a lentil stew made as a side dish in India.  It's basically just lentils (which are an excellent source of protein) and spices.  It's usually a side dish in India as a way of getting protein into a vegetarian diet.  However, I find it so filling and satisfying that I make it a dinner staple throughout the week.

Dahl

¾ lb dry red lentils

20 oz Chicken Broth (you'll need more)

1 chopped garlic clove

2 medium yellow onions, chopped

2 tbsp vegetable or olive oil

1 bay leaf

1 tsp ground cumin

1 tsp ground coriander

1 tsp ground fennel

1 tbsp hot paprika

1 tsp ground turmeric

½ tsp crushed red pepper

Salt to taste

Garnish:

Fried onions

Toasted almonds

Raisins

1.       Soak lentils in cold water for 1 hour

2.       Drain and place in heavy saucepan with enough chicken broth to cover

3.       Simmer slowly, stirring occasionally

4.       Heat oil in heavy frying pan

5.       Sautee onion and garlic until golden

6.       Add bay leaf and spices and stir over medium heat for 3-4 minutes

7.       Add onion mixture to lentils and stir

8.       Add water or broth if liquid has been observed

9.       Cook for 45 minutes to 1 hour over low heat, adding liquid as needed

Sevilla

Our weekend visitor is Miss Sevilla.  She is one of ECAD's Spanish Girls (Madrid, Barcelona, Sevilla, and Valencia).  She's a 9-month old black lab/golden retriever cross and she's a little devil (but in a fun way).  Her house manners are awesome, but she's filled with energy and can be totally bonkers.  Her real crazies come out when she gets a hold of Pauly's pink squeaky ball (pink is a manly color for the manliest of mature Paulywogs).  A brief reminder for me that puppies are fun, but puppies are definitely work (literally, they are best left at work)!  We took a walk around the Tarrytown Reservoir today with the two pups and Pauly rocked his adventure pack, bringing great pleasure to passing children.

Pauly's Baby

Pauly kisses his baby

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Calm down, Pauly is not pregnant.  That's not even possible, duh!  Though he does have a new baby.  And it has 8 legs.  And he loooooooves it (something we can't forget to tease him about).  His baby doesn't have a name, we just call it "Pauly's baby" and it makes a wide variety of noises, all of which Pauly finds thrilling and escalate his interactions with his baby to sillier and sillier levels.  And for the first time in his life, Pauly loves his baby so much that he's resisting his primal, labrador, demolition urge and the baby has remained intact for 2 full weeks.  Survival of the fittest. 

I have a dream...

Pursuit of Happiness

It's been awhile since I wrote a blog post.  I could say it's because I don't have time, or because I'm absolutely exhausted all of the time, or because I don't even have time to speak to my best friends, or get a cup of coffee, or pee.  Those are all just excuses.  I think the real reason I haven't posted in so long is because I haven't felt very happy or confident.  I feel like I'm trying to sprint through a marathon.  From the moment I wake up to the moment I hit my pillow at night, I am sprinting.  I love my job, I love the dogs, I love the clients, I love the students.  I also love ice cream, but I'll still get a stomach ache if I eat a whole gallon.  I am literally working myself to death and functioning at a stress level that is way too high to be healthy.  I work more hours than my investment banker little brother, who makes seven times as much money as I do (without a graduate degree).  I would be happy if I spent all of those hours training dogs, but the reality is that I spend most of those hours making spreadsheets, organizing people, managing the madness.  I feel like my training skills are slipping.  I am not the trainer I used to be, I am hearing all my fellow trainers telling me to do things differently and I'm losing my instinct.  My instinct used to be on point.  I think it's just because I haven't seriously trained in ages.  I feel stressed and exhausted.  So, you ask, what are you doing about it?  Well, first things first, I am taking more time for myself.  I am taking better care of my body.  This means thinking ahead about what I'm going to eat when I get home from work at 8:30pm.  This means hitting the gym on all those days I'm not working until 8:30pm.  It means saying "no" when I simply can't add anything else to my plate.  I need to make time for friends and family, even if it's just a phone call.  The bottom line, is I need to work out a better work-life-balance.  I need to take charge of my own happiness. 

Happiness

Puppies and Piggies

As part of my apprenticeship at ECAD, I will be spending a couple of months at each of the different schools that we work in.  This will give me a chance to learn about training at all the different stages of puppy development, and to learn about the different populations of students that we work with.  I began this rotation at a school called Green Chimneys.  Green Chimneys is located in Brewster, NY and it is a residential or day-school that serves children with emotional, behavioral, social, and learning challenges.  The thing that makes Green Chimneys so amazing is that it has pioneered the use of animal-assisted therapy with the students.  The school takes in abused, mistreated, and unwanted animals and gives them a fresh start on life.  All of the animals that do not have the potential to be rehabilitated remain on the campus for life.  The students work on "the farm", caring for chickens, pigs, goats, sheep, cows, owls, hawks, vultures, eagles, llamas, and, of course, puppies!  That's where I come in.  All of ECAD's puppies start their education at Green Chimneys.  This means that we are working with itty bitty pups ranging from 2 to 6 months old.  Our current class consists of Sevilla, Barcelona, Valencia, and Madrid (6-month old labs) and Ace, Bauer, Specht, Hanson, and Boone (3-month old golden retrievers).  Today was a special day because it was also the first day of school for Blondie's pup pups who are just 5 weeks old.  They seemed to enjoy their first day and we look forward to having them back when they're a bit older.

Barcelona, Madrid, Ace, Specht, and ?

In my first two weeks at Green Chimneys, I've learned a lot about training such young puppies.  The first thing that I learned is that they are really, incredibly, unbelievably frustrating.  I have been spoiled for 3 months with the older dogs and it's a real adjustment when you realize that a puppy barely knows how to sit or walk on a leash.  For me, this has been the most challenging thing I've experienced since working for ECAD.  I forgot how much patience and motivation puppies require.  I catch myself saying "no" when they don't even know better.  Working with the puppies makes me feel like a failure about 90% of the time, but then those moments when they truly learn something that I taught them makes it all worth while.

Bella and Jazmine

After a day spent with 9 5-week old labrador puppies and meeting a mini potbellied pig named Bella, how could I not love my job (I've always wanted a pet pig).  If you're in NYC this weekend, be sure to check out the Blessing of the Animals at the Cathedral of St. John the Divine.  Green Chimneys animals, staff, and students will be at the service and I can say first-hand that it is something every animal-lover must see.