Teaching

I never really thought about becoming a teacher.  I’m not nurturing, nor do I particularly like kids, nor do I particularly enjoy speaking in front of people, nor do I have any patience.  Like, none.  At all.  Over the past few weeks, as I’ve transitioned into taking over my own class, I’ve surprised myself by how much I am actually enjoying the challenge of motivating and educating my kids and their dogs.  On Tuesday, my students were playing their “my dog does everything already so I’m done” game.  I don’t blame them – it’s exhausting to train dogs for 2+ hours.  Lunchtime roles around and I have 8 boys and 10 sandwiches.  Everybody got 1, but they’re growing teenage boys, so they’re starving.  Whoever’s dog tugs open the heavy door and sits and holds it open long enough for you to walk through it, wins a sandwich.  You get 2 tries and then the next person goes.  We go through all 8 dogs and some came close, but inevitably dropped the door before the student could get through it.  They’re getting really competitive, coming up with new techniques, different ropes on the door, different positioning of themselves and their dogs.  They’re really thinking about it and getting so frustrated that their dog can’t do it.  Finally, on the second time through the group, Dior and his student won their sandwich.  They were proud of themselves, though everybody else was jealous, worked up, unhappy with their ¼ of a sandwich.  It was nice to see the kids enthusiastic, motivated, creative, and trying incredibly hard.  Nicer, though, was seeing the kids the following 2 days as they worked and problem solved how to get their dog to really know the commands involved. 

In order to calm some of that heated, competitive energy, we worked on teaching the dogs not to get too excited when people get on the floor with them.  Having them lay underneath their trainer is great practice for clients with narcolepsy who may need the dog to pick their head off the ground if they're face down and in danger of suffocation.  Though it resembles nap time, it really is work!

"Forward! No! Let's Go!"

Greetings from Westchester!  On Monday I started my new job at Educated Canines Assisting with Disabilities (ECAD), a non-profit service dog organization located about 30 minutes outside of Manhattan.  I know it's only been 4 full days, but already I LOVE MY JOB!  ECAD uses at-risk youth to train the dogs for people with disabilities (about half veterans and half civilians).  The kids are responsible for all levels of training, from puppy to placement (ready to work).  They are also responsible for maintaining the kennels, grooming the dogs, feeding, etc.  For the next 9 months I am going to be learning the ins and outs of the dog training and the teaching so that I can take over my own group of dogs and kids and become an instructor.  This week, I have been shadowing the instructors and learning a bit more about dog training and about how things work at ECAD.  The people, both staff and students, are totally awesome and I'm loving spending my day with them.  I know this is going to sound super cheesy, but hearing the veterans talk about how this program helps them and watching the kids struggle to train the dogs and work their butts off here is truly amazing.  I have no doubt that I am making a difference AND I'm not sitting at a desk on a computer all day which is an added bonus. 

Thus far, I have been struggling with unlearning commands from the Guide Dog Foundation and replacing them with the ECAD commands.  Many of them overlap, so I actually have a head start, but it reminds me of when I tried to learn Spanish after learning French and I ended up speaking Franish or Spench.  Either way, the dogs are confused when I tell them "Forward" instead of "Let's Go" or "Inside" instead of "Go Through".  Most of the dogs here are Golden Retrievers, which is a less familiar breed for me.  They are more enthusiastic and goofy than labs.  These dogs are also "softer" and a bit easier to train.  Yesterday I was in awe watching the high school boys run through an exercise where one person had to control 6 dogs.  The dogs were all on their "jump on" boxes, which are 2 foot high tables where they get groomed.  Going down the line, each kid had to ask the dog to "jump on" or get off and go under the box, while maintaining order and keeping the other 5 dogs in place.  Then they had to ask the dogs to all "sit" or "down" or "shake" and then we took toys out and started trying to distract the dogs by tossing rope toys over their heads while the person in the "training" position maintained control.  All of this without touching the dogs, the leashes, and using minimal body language (ie. no pointing).  I must say, when it was my turn, I was nervous but successful at getting all the dogs to go under their table and stay.  Today I worked with 3 or 4 dogs on turning on and off light switches.  I also worked on having the dogs pick stuff up and hold it for me.  Such smart doggies!  Pauly is also loving having so many new friends and getting to hang out with mom all day in the training center.  He's exhausted and happy with his new life.  Today one of the kids took one of the electric wheelchairs and took Pauly for a "run" around campus.  They're best friends now.

Small world tidbit of the day: the chairwoman of my department at Columbia walked into ECAD this afternoon to pick up a dog.  She is one of the weekend homes for our dogs in the program.  I was totally surprised and confused to see her.  How funny, huh?

Congratulations Class of 2011

Health is a human right.  The public health community exists to safeguard that right.  I believe it is a defining element of a civil society.  Public health represents the collective actions necessary to protect the health of all people.  Through prevention science and practice we can accomplish this goal.  As a public health professional, guided by these principles, I declare the following:

I will work to ensure that people have the chance to live full and productive lives, free from avoidable disease and disability and supported in their pursuit of physical, mental, and social well-being. I will hold myself to the highest ethics, standards, values, and responsibilities as I move forward the science and practice of public health. I will respect the rights, values, beliefs, and cultures of those individuals and communities with whom I work. I will rely on evidence to support my decisions and actions, and translate that evidence into policies and programs that improve health for all. I will add to the body of research and knowledge and share my discoveries freely. I will continuously seek new information and be open to ideas that can better protect and promote the health of populations. I will advance health literacy for all and seek equity and justice for vulnerable populations.   With this oath, I commit to the ideals and mission of public health.  THIS IS PUBLIC HEALTH: Thank you to the brilliant, wonderful, talented, beautiful colleagues I have had the privilege of learning with for the past two years.  We will be friends forever.  Congratulations! xoxo Lia T Schwartz, MPH

Regressing

Not rain, nor sleet, nor snow, nor finals can stop Paulywog from playing

I find that as the weather gets nicer and graduation nears, my attention span is dwindling.  In college, I could spend an entire day working.  Literally.  16 hours or so.  Jill can vouch for that.  I was so focused and studious that I graduated in 3 years.  Now I have to force myself to focus for 30 minutes and then take a break.  Even during those 30 minutes I get distracted with email, facebook, NYtimes.com, etc.  I literally have the attention span of a squirrel, which I've heard is about 1 second.  Think about it, when was the last time you saw a squirrel focus on something for more than a second?

NYC is very green today

The past few weeks have also been a bit of an emotional roller coaster for me.  Apparently I cope with that by regressing from a mature adult into some sort of silly, frivolous child.  I just want to play and do fun things all day.  I am trying very hard to suppress that and just focus (FOCUS, dammit!) on my last assignment before graduation.

There were other things I wanted to vent about in this post.  Namely my dumbass neighbor who won't neuter his increasingly aggressive bulldog because it threatens his own manliness, the final exam I just took asking me to recall the totally irrelevant name of an obscure province in China, the totally stressful commencement speaker competition, and some other things.  But alas... SQUIRREL!

Opinionated Procrastination: Government Shutdowns and Non-Profit Management

Government Shutdown
Dear friends, I am disappointed in you.  My Facebook newsfeed is seemingly void of any discussion of America's most current and shocking failure.  Pia, the stunning and talented American Idol was sent home last night because of your failure to vote.  Instead, I am seeing a constant stream of poorly informed chatter about government shutdowns and Obama's failures.  Don't you understand that a talented Jersey girl's dreams were crushed, just crushed last night?

Ok, in all seriousness, folks, I don't watch American Idol and I'm slightly embarrassed for even knowing about this Pia woman.  I am disappointed, though.  I'm disappointed that people make poorly educated statements blaming Obama and the Dems for this government shutdown.  First of all, the government is shutting down because of our representatives' inability to compromise and play nice for the sake of the American people.  In case you missed Kindergarten, a compromise (definition: to come to agreement by mutual concession) requires give and take from all parties.  So 50% of this crises cannot be blamed on Obama & Co (and I think that's being generous).  Secondly, the reason Congress is getting paid while other deserving and essential employees and troops are not is because the Republicans failed to pass a bill that would stop Congress' paychecks in the event of a shutdown.  Hear that?  So before you go copying and pasting Facebook statuses blaming Obama for the troops and employees not getting paid while he and Congress get their paychecks, let's all remember that Obama & Co not only agree with you, but they tried to do something about it.  Oh, and please, get your shit together about Planned Parenthood before you spout made-up non-facts on the Senate floor.

Non-profit Management
On a very different note, I would like to vent briefly about how not to run a non-profit.  Over the past few weeks I have been stockpiling frustrations with the many non-profits I am involved in and I have compiled a collection of non-profit no nos.  To be clear, this is not directed at any particular non-profit and is based on experiences with at least 5 different organizations and I am not naming names or calling anybody out.

1. When people make a donation, do not include a donation slip in your thank you letter.  That's just tacky.
2. Do not affiliate with poorly planned and distasteful events (eg. beer pong tournaments), even if it does mean money for you.
3. Do affiliate with well-planned, well-organized, and tasteful events (eg. book talks, walkathons, picnics), even when they may not be all about you, especially if it does mean money for you. (#3 is also known as cutting off the nose to spite the face)
4. Do not host an upscale volunteer dinner and tell volunteers that they can't bring a guest/date (even at a charge), especially when the volunteers don't know each other.  Who wants to show up at a formal reception when they don't know a single other person?

Now I must get back to my seemingly hundredth paper in 2 years on the obesity epidemic.  If you haven't had enough frustration, anger, or disappointment in your day, I suggest you check out the pretty colors in this video. 

Submit Thesis, Buy Shoes

Today I:
Completed masters thesis
Will submit masters thesis
Bought celebratory long-awaited Tom's shoes
Bought celebratory lily at Trader Joe's
Visited with peacocks at the Cathedral
Totally rocked a challenging and stressful midterm

If this fella is going to be a main character on my blog, I think we ought to name him.  Suggestions?

Blurry phone picture, but this is the albino peacock.  He needs a name, too!

Pauly thought this was quite the formidable bird.

Submit thesis: check, Buy self pretty things: check

Whirlwind Week

First things first in case you get bored and don't read past the first paragraph: Please visit my friend Erin's blog and fill out her research questionnaire about your dog.  I know her hypothesis and I'm curious to see her findings, which will only be valid if enough people complete the questionnaire. 

This has been a totally whirlwind week.  On Sunday, I went to a neighborhood in Queens called Jackson Heights, which is a predominantly Indian neighborhood.  Thanks to my Queens-native classmate, Hannah, we went to the most delicious and inexpensive Indian lunch buffet ever.  For $10, we gorged ourselves on hot, fresh, authentic Indian food that was better than any I've ever had (other than homemade by Jay's grandma and aunt).  After our feast, we perused the shops filled with jewelery and saris with gorgeous beading and colors.  A severe food coma ensued and I believe I sat on my couch for the remainder of the afternoon. 

Also this week:

• All-day job interview at Yale: went well but I don't think it is the job for me.  Beggars can't be choosers, but I'm looking for a career, not just a job.  Great job, not great career. 
• Pet therapy at the hospital: Pauly was so popular and it was a shame that we could only stay an hour before sprinting off to Connecticut.  For the first time, we even got people out of bed to help me walk him down the hospital corridors.  One lady in a full-leg cast even hobbled with us all the way to the elevators when it was time to go.

How could this not cheer you up?

• In Connecticut, I spent the night with my mom's best friend, Kate, and her granddaughter, Zarah.  It was cozy and fun and I loved spending time with them.  I'm not a big fan of kids, but I really love Zarah.  Seeing them more often would be a major perk of a job in CT. 

Pauly, Lia, and Zarah (May 2010)

• For my Urban Space and Health class final project, we need to create a poster/movie/podcast about "participating in the city".  After meeting with my professor, I decided to do a movie about being the Area Coordinator for the GDF and film puppies participating in the city.  I think it will be fun and, as my professor says, how can you not win with puppies?
• The Daily Show: I must say, Jon, you disappointed me.  After seeing Colbert, I had my hopes up for Jon Stewart.  I like his show better, I think he's smarter, and I think he's kinder.  I was so psyched to see him live.  Major letdown.  Everything from the interns who greet you and psych you up, to the warm-up comedian, to the q&a, to the show was so much worse than Colbert.  At Jon Stewart, I felt like I was just watching the show, with an audience about 3 times the size of the Report, and it didn't seem like Jon was enjoying it or enjoying our presence.  At Colbert, I felt like I was chilling with Stephen and that he was feeding off our energy and vice versa.  I still like the Daily Show better, but if you are going to see one live, I give Colbert 5 stars and Jon 3 for the fun-factor and the entertainment factor.  
• Haircut: I had the greatest haircut yesterday.  Julie, the best stylist ever, always does such a good job and I find the salon really relaxing.  For the first time, she blew it out straight yesterday after the cut and I got to feel pretty all day.  Unfortunately, this April showers thing cut the prettiness short, but it was fun while it lasted.  I have yet to see it curly, but I think it's really short!

Paulywog isn't feeling well, so we have been doing lots of snuggling and taking it easy.  I woke up at 2am and at 7am to take him outside because I didn't want any accidents and both times he just looked at me like "Leave me alone, mom, I'm trying to sleep".  He was right, I packed him so full of rice he didn't need to go.  We both went back to sleep and snoozed until 12:30.  He's still snoozing.

Sweet, sick Paulywog

Let Us Recap

According the the little countdown on Sophie's page, she just turned 9 months old!  I can't believe it for two reasons.  1) She is so small!  At 45 pounds, she is currently nestled comfortably in my lap.  Shouldn't she have turned into that gigantic bruiser dog we all expected when she was a baby?  2) She is so immature!  She doesn't know nearly as much as most dogs her age, something we worked really hard on for the past 2 weeks.  Socially, she thinks she's a little puppy and had no problem taking on a mastiff AND a husky (at the same time!) at the dog park this week.  Only a crazy puppy with delusions of grandeur would engage 6 times her body weight in a wrestling match. 

For the past two weeks, my dog focus has been all Sophie all the time.  Poor Pauly has been entrusted to my parents and brother, and I haven't even seen him in a whole week!  I miss that easy-going, lazy old man.  I have enjoyed my 2 straight weeks with Sophie because I usually share responsibility for her with my parents.  She is in NYC with me and Pauly on Mondays and Tuesdays, and then on Long Island with my parents for the rest of the week.  I think it is confusing for her to live in two different homes and to answer to three different people.  She has really responded well to consistency and having one handler.  It has also given me an opportunity to bond with her, something I never really did because there was always her Pauly or competing humans around.  She learned a lot in the past 2 weeks.  She's walking with a looser leash, not jumping on people when they pet her, not running up to every single dog on the street, and trusting me more in "scary" situations like stairs or heights.  I'm proud of her, but there's still a lot more work to be done before she's ready to go in for formal training in 3 months. 

In other news, I believe my birthday festivities have finally come to an end.  Mind you, my actual birthday was almost 3 months ago.  My best friend, Erika, seriously prolonged the festivities.  2 months after my birthday, she made me this amazing chocolate raspberry (my fave) cake.

Yes, this tasted as good as it looks.

For my birthday present, she got me tickets to see the Propeller all male Shakespeare troop perform A Comedy of Errors at BAM.  Let me just say, the show was phenomenal.  It was the perfect combination of staying true to Shakespeare and the language while being accessible to a broad audience.  Complete with a sombrero and soccer jersey clad chorus, a naked man running across stage with a sparkler in his arse, and Shakespeare's witty and crass humor.  It was SO.MUCH.FUN.  And before the theatre, she made Aditi, Jay, and I a feast!

Salad, baguette, and fresh tricolor fettucine from Little Italy with sundried tomato and mushroom cream sauce

Slaving away in my kitchen

Jay visited for a few hours and fell asleep on the kitchen floor with Sophie

Yum!

I know this post is super long, but it's probably the only one you're getting for awhile.  Between now and Thursday, Pauly and I have pet therapy scheduled at the hospital, I have to go to Connecticut for an all day job interview, I am going to see the Daily Show, and I need to stay on top of my classes.  I also think I'm getting sick.

"What?  You were writing a super long blog post and I am bored with all my toys and missing my brother.  I see no problem with flipping the water bowl and running around the apartment with it."

I need to go clean up.

NYT Article Inundation (keep 'em coming!)

My apologies for the back-to-back posts.  I'm getting off my computer soon.

I am officially being inundated with NYT articles relevant to my life and career.  Keep sending 'em, people!  I can't read fast enough so thank you to those friends and colleagues who are flooding my inbox.
I must share from the past 24 hours:

Easing the Way in Therapy With the Aid of an Animal - This is the subject of a grant I'm working on, not to mention Pauly and I are a Delta Society registered pet therapy team and visit patients at the hospital every other Tuesday. (March 15, 2011)

Forget the Treadmill. Get a Dog. - My thesis in a nutshell (as previously mentioned) (March 14, 2011)

Emotional Power Broker of the Modern Family - Family pets are more than "just pets" (March 14, 2011)

Mid-20s Life Crisis

In 70 days (oh shit, is it really just 70 days!!??), I will graduate from graduate school.  I will have letters (3 of them, if we’re counting) to write after a comma after my name in my e-mail signature.  After 18 years of school, I will finally be done (unless I want to trade those 3 letters for a different set).  18 years!  That’s ¾ of my life.  So here’s the kicker – now what?

The way I see it, I have three choices.  Maybe.

1.  I could, for the first time in my life, prioritize my relationship first and move wherever Jay winds up employed and hopefully find myself a decent job that keeps the Purina One flowing and doesn’t destroy too many brain cells.  My track record for option 1 isn’t looking so good.  For the duration of our 7 year relationship, we have lived in the same state for a whopping 2 years because we have both prioritized ourselves and our careers before our relationship.  Not to mention, I have some sort of pathological aversion to marriage (which was recently re-affirmed when one of my best friends sent me a photo of her engagement ring and all I could think was “omg, when did we get old enough for that!!??”  BTW, congrats to Jillian and Ryan.  So happy for you guys and thanks for not making me go first).
2. I could find the job of my dreams, which probably doesn’t pay well and definitely allows Pauly to come to work with me every day.  With option 2, I will earn way less than my degree is worth but enjoy going to work each day.
3. I could find a soul-sucking cubicle that will one day turn into an office where I will sit each day of the next 45+ years of my working life.  I will be able to afford the convertible I’ve always wanted and maybe even a swimming pool in my backyard (for Pauly to swim laps, obvi).  Of course, this job will most likely lead to a Lasix/Prozac/Tequila dependency by age 30.  

I’m being cynical, you say?  I wish I were being cynical.  At the moment, I’ve sent out over 100 resumes to actual, existing jobs for which I am qualified and could be successful at and over 50 resumes for non-existent jobs that I’ve invented and attempted to convince employers to create just for me (I'm shameless).  Alas, I have not received a single phone call.  I know, I know, the economy sucks, unemployment is still at 8.9%, blah blah blah.  But the thing is, I’m good, dammit!  I’m good!  I’m smart!  I’m organized!  I’m passionate!  I’m educated!  I’m really, really good.  So why don’t employers call me?  Why don’t employers call my friends?  Why is there suddenly a surplus of ivy league-educated graduating graduate students huddled in the corner of the library consoling each other about moving back into their childhood bedrooms?  We’re all good.  We all deserve an opportunity to change the world, fall in love, and be able to afford a sushi dinner once in a while. 

That’s it.  I’m officially creating a blog tag for “venting”.  Can I get an amen?

Thankful

Through some very last minute, strategic, crazy planning, I traded the dog I was supposed to be watching for the week, "Holden the Golden" for this sweet boy:

I was sad to see "Holden" go because he was a lovely dog and an excellent house guest and he had the perfect energy level for Sophie.  Unfortunately, the new visitor has fast-growing tumors and his life-expectancy is down to just a few weeks.  The good news is, someone loves him very much and she is flying from out-of-state tomorrow (the week before her wedding) to pick him up and bring him back home!  With the last minute-ness and the flight schedule and everything, the only way it would work out for her to get him was if she stayed with me in NYC tomorrow night and I picked up the dog today.  So, of course, that's what we're doing. And yes, he's sitting on my couch and being spoiled rotten.

Having him here makes me realize how thankful I am that everybody around me (dogs and people) are healthy and happy.  It also makes me thankful that dogs live in the moment, because you wouldn't even know this dog was sick as he's just running around and playing and loving his life (and tennis balls!).  It's beautiful and very bittersweet.

I promised this blog wouldn't be all about dogs, but right now that seems to be all that's going on in my life. Four dogs in a week - it's like a revolving door!  Tomorrow I'm going to the Colbert Report for my friend's birthday, so be sure to watch and try to spot me in the audience.  I can't wait until Tuesday when things are back to normal and it's just me and Paulywog.  We're going to order delivery and watch NCIS reruns and it will be blissful.  Then maybe I'll think about getting back to work on my thesis and figuring out what's going on in my classes.  It's a miracle I'm even keeping my head above water given that I haven't done school work in a week.

For now, give your loved ones a kiss and be thankful for what you have.